Glory and Gore
by dragonrider848
Summary: England snaps at America in an epic fashion leaving the latter's heart in shards on the floor. It comes to light that this has been happening for a long time and was a gradual process. Can England pick up the pieces of his loves heart and put them back together? Or is America to far gone to save? This is my first fan fiction so review please! rated m for potential future content!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: hiya everyone! Dragonrider is in the house! So I am new to this site and this is my first fan fiction here. Whoo hoo! Just so everyone knows I love constructive criticism and it is highly welcomed and appreciated so tell me what you really think guys because I want to be the best I can for you! I would also like to say that while I am not completely against flamers they do hurt my feelings... T^T **

**Any way I should stop blabbing now and get down to BUSINESS! XD**

**(full warnings posted on my profile kay guys ;3)**

**DISCLAIMER: HETALIA IS UNFORTUNATELY NOT MINE T^T**

_England_

"I HATE YOU AMERICA! I HAVE HATED YOU SINCE THE BLOODY AMERICAN REVOLUTION! LEAVE ME ALONE!" I yelled at him ruthlessly almost instantly regretting it. The argument we had was over something so trivial too... I had not been having a good day though and I was very stressed out I just snapped at him. The hurt in his eyes was overwhelming and tears started to well up as he swallowed hard trying not cry and not doing a great job of it. "O-oh.. I... Y-You..." he looked down as the tears spilt over, "I am sorry!" he said as he ran away with everything he had. Some other lad, his brother Canadia I think, reached out and tried to stop the fleeing american in vain, "Alfred, wait!" After that the room was deathly silent, no one was even daring to breath, even that bloody frog was silent...

It was in fact so quiet that the slap I received echoed pretty well through the entire meeting room stunning everyone further. I looked up to see who slapped me and saw none other than Canada (was that it?) standing over me arm post-slap. "WHAT THE HELL ENGLAND WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?!" he yelled furiously. At first I could do nothing but stare at the normally soft spoken nation before me, but as soon as I regained my wits I of course had to make it worse by saying "He was the bloody git that started it in the first place!" Canada then slapped me across the other side of my face making my head jerk to the side and my mouth fill with the metallic taste of blood from my now split lip. "ARE YOU F*CKING KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW?! DO YOU EVEN HAVE A BRAIN IN YOUR HEAD?!" No one in the meeting room dare to make so much as a peep. none of them had even seen the enraged blond before me angry much less violent. I could only manage to groan and put my hand on my cheek. "I HOPE THAT F*CKING HURTS!" he screamed as he grabbed his jacket and his silly little bear and stormed out of the room. _Mission accomplished Canada, _I thought to my self, _this freaking hurts._ "Angleterre?" France finally dared to break the silence. "Shut up frog." I mumbled as I too left the room leaving the other nations to their confusion...

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**A/N: Ok so there it is! I am sorry about the shortness I promise to try and make these chapters longer but my mom is nagging me... Any way I love you all and please throw me a review I would love to hear your thoughts ;) **

**Dragonrider, out!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Alright guys! Dragon here for another round! Ok, I know my last chapter was really short and lame ****_sooooo _****i swear this one will be a lot better! OH YEAH and HOLY COW GUYS! I got three followers! SPECIAL VIRTUAL COOKIES FOR: lady-norie, ladyyoko00, and dragoneellover! THANKS GUYS LOOOOVE YOU ALL! this is going to be lot easier for me because I told my mum that I was doing a science project which was not completely untrue because technically I did start out doing a science project... Dragoneellover knows the one I am talking about. Any who that was a private rant between me and dragonee so back on track here! GUYS YOU CAN SKIP THE REST IF YOU WANT BUT PLEASE READ THIS! All basic warnings for this and any other story I may post in the future are on my profile! I will include additional warnings if they apply. **

**Any way let get down to BUSINESS!**

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN HETALIA! T^T**

_Canada_

I cant believe he did that! As if my brother did not feel bad enough! Given, Alfred can be irritating and thick but he means well and Arthur knows that! Ugh, my hand really hurts from hitting England... Must have hit him a lot harder than I thought... I will apologise as soon as soon as he apologizes to Alfred! what he said was completely cruel and uncalled for!

I still can't find Alfred either. He must have taken of to his apartment. I had forgotten how fast he was! Maybe he will cheer up if I make him some chocolate chip pancakes, I know how much he loves them... I made my way to his apartment after a little bit of trouble remembering the number. "Alfred?" I said knocking on the door. At first I got no response but then I faintly heard, "Go away!" and I could tell by how he sounded how upset he was.

"Come on Alfred its Canada! Let me in please?" I said a bit pleadingly. Again his answer was a bit delayed, "M-Mattie?" he asked tentatively.

"Yes Alfred its me. I want to help you." I said.

"... Door is open..." he said so quietly I almost didn't hear him. I walked in to the messy apartment he used for meetings. As messy as usual. Shocker. I rounded the corner and walked into Alfred's room. He was huddled in a corner hugging his knees and crying. "Alfred..." I said quietly as I walked over to him, "are you ok?" "N-no." He choked out. I frowned and opened my arms to hug him. The American almost instantly crushed me in a hug.

"Hey don't cry Alfred... its ok... He was just being an ass... It is his fault not yours..." I said as I rubbed his back.

"M-Mattie, wh-what did I do?" he said hiccuping and stuttering from his tears.

"Nothing Alfred... Like I said already it was his fault for yelling at you not yours..." I said softly.

America hugged me even closer forgetting that he is ten times stronger than I am and i was sure he was going to strangle me. "Th-then why doesn't he love me anymore?" He said sobs increasing with each word. He sounded so hurt, he reminded me of a puppy that had been kicked to many times.

"Al... I am sure he didn't mean it..." I said slowly.

He just cried until he finally fell asleep...

OoO

_America- A few weeks later..._

I don't know exactly how long it had been because quite frankly, I really didn't care. The pain was to much for me to bear. I just couldn't stand it, the man who raised me, who I have looked up to since forever, the man I loved, hated me. He didn't want me anymore, and it _hurt _so much because I had been trying for so long to make up for that war but it wasn't enough. He _hated _me. I never wanted to believe that he meant all those things he said to me but now it started to dawn on me that he really did think that I was just some stupid, lazy, irritating nuisance. Every breath made the molten knives in my chest go deeper, every heart beat felt like broken glass was being driven into my chest from the inside out.

Had Mattie left? I didn't know but he hasn't come to try and make eat yet so I guessed that he had. He probably was tired of me too. The thought sent another wave of pain through me. I just didn't understand why the pain wouldn't go away. I wanted that agonizing beat to stop. I dug around for a bit before finally finding a piece of crumbled paper and beginning to write...

OoO

_Canada_

I had been called back to my country by my boss despite me telling him that Alfred seriously needed me right now. Sometimes being a nation was a real pain in the neck.

When I walked into Alfred's house the first thing I noticed that was odd was the completely neat home still spotless from when I had cleaned a week ago. Not a thing had been moved not even the video games were moved. The second thing was that Alfred was not in his bed but instead a piece of slightly crumpled paper was in his place.

I picked up the paper and saw i note on it in America's sloppy hand writing: _To whoever finds this letter my name is Alfred F. Jones. I would appreciate for this letter to be given to my brother, Matthew Williams. _

_Mattie: I am sorry. I know you will probably hate me for this if you don't already. I just couldn't take it any more. I tried to accept it and move on. I tried to act like it didn't hurt so much... But I couldn't... I was weak... And I know you will probably never forgive me for that. I only wanted for England to be proud of me. I just wanted for him to love me again like he used to... But I guess I failed there to... He thinks I am a joke. In the end I wasn't good enough. I know this is selfish of me to ask of you but please tell England that I am so sorry for hurting him? And for the war... I know that it was my fault that happened... I do love you bro. You have stood by me for a long time even when I acted like an idiot. Thanks for that by the way you did not have to put up with me but you did anyway. I love you Mattie..._

_-Alfred/America_

What in the name of sanity was this?!

"ALFRED?!" I screamed an overwhelming sense of dread taking over my mind...

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**A/N: Yaaay I finished a new chapie and I found the line button! And it was over a thousand words! VICTORY IS MINE! XDDDD Any way I hope it was better than the first one but I won't know unless you guys review for me! I am serious! Negative or positive I don't care just tell me what what you think ok? **

**Dragon, out!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: HIIIII! Dragon is back guys! Wow I surprise myself with my updating habits! This has been three days in a row! Wow! Ok so any way I have two reviews! And both were very nice! (even if dragonee was being a pansy again) Special thanks and virtual cookies for: KaseySteelUSA and dragoneellover**! **I love you! To those who are wondering: yes, dragonee and I know each other personally we are actually best friends at school! Also I just realized that I accidentally named this after a song by Lorde. Oops. Just so I don't get in trouble the title for this was (technically) inspired by Lorde. THIS IS NOT A SONG FIC THOUGH! THAT WAS AN ACCIDENT! **

**Ok I believe that concludes my message to the readers. Let's get down to BUSINESS!**

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN HETALIA! T^T**

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"ALFRED?!" I screamed an overwhelming sense of dread taking over my mind.

I ran through the eerily dark house searching for my big brother before I finally found him lying in a scary puddle of blood on his bathroom floor. He had gotten skinner in the week I had been gone (go figure I had to force him to eat anything while I was here) and he was very pale. There was so much blood around him that the white little bathroom was almost completely stained with crimson.

"ALFRED!" I screamed as I bolted to his side and lifted his head into my lap not caring that I was getting blood on my clothes, "Alfred?! Wake up! Please!"

He opened his eyes weakly but they were dull, "Ma…ttie…" he whispered so softly that I barely heard him.

"Oh dear God Alfred! Why the hell did you do this to yourself?!" I said seeing the jagged cuts on his wrists. He couldn't answer me because he had already passed back out. I panicked and picked him up bridal style and almost fell backwards from how light he was, _oh Alfred why?, _I thought as I ran outside and put him in the back of my car. I literally jumped in the driver seat started the car and drove off full speed not giving a flying fuck about the speed limit…

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_Canada_

Apparently, I had made it to the hospital just in time a few moments more, the doctor had said, and Alfred would have died of blood loss. I was in my brother's room now waiting for him to wake up but it had been hours since the blood transfusion and stitches and he still hadn't awoken. I was beginning to get even more worried. I needed someone to talk to… but also someone that wouldn't tell England because I wanted to do that… The one person I could trust to both remember who I am and not run his mouth if I asked him to came to my mind and I called Prussia…

OoO

_Prussia _

I was being awesome at west's house as usual. I had no clue where west was but he definitely was not here because he had not bitched me out for making a mess yet. He was probably off being a workaholic like usual. He was way to up tight. That little Italian was gone too. Kesesese, maybe the two of them went on a date. I was so absorbed in my thoughts that when my phone rung I almost peed myself. _Typical,_ I thought, _phones are like toasters, they scare the shit out of you when you least expect it. _I answered the phone,"hallo?"

"Hi, Prussia." Greeted a shy voice. I smiled recognizing my caller's voice.

"Hey Matt! What's up?" I said happily.

"Uh well… America is in the hospital… I needed someone to talk to… Its creepy here…" he spoke tentatively.

"So not awesome! What happened?" I exclaimed.

"H-he… He tried to kill himself…" Canada said hesitantly. I could hear the tears in my friend's voice.

"WHAT!" I yelled, "what he do that for?!"

"Well… England said some really terrible things to him… He got really sad and… H-he…" the shy nation tried to finish but seemed to be having trouble.

"It's ok I get the picture…"I said. A long silence passed between us.

"Gilbert I am scared…" he said quietly.

"Don't be it'll be ok you got him to the hospital right?" I said reassuringly.

"Yea I did." He answered.

"Then I am sure he will be fine." I said.

"Yea your right. Thanks Gilbert." Canada said gratefully.

"Anytime Matt." I said with a giggle, "you know I can kick England's ass too if you want me to."

"Actually I want to talk to England so can u keep it a secret until I do please?" he said surprising me a little.

"Ok if you say so Matt." I said with my eyebrows raised.

"Gilbert? If you aren't busy could you come to America? I need someone to help me…" he asked slowly.

"Course I can. I'll be there as soon as I pack some bags and leave west a note ok? Oh and don't worry I am just going to tell west where I went not why. Bye Matt I will see you in a bit kay!" I said happily…

OoO

_Prussia_

I landed in some American town a few hours later and rented a car. Matt had texted me the name of the hospital so all I had to do now was drive there. I could not help but wonder what could have possibly pushed America so far over the edge. England must've really let him have it this time. Whatever by hurting America so badly he also hurt my best friend! No one hurts the awesome me's awesome friends!

I really didn't know what to expect once I got to the hospital but is certainly was worse than I thought. When I walked into the room I saw Mathew asleep against the wall but his brother was in the bed passed out. The poor kid was really skinny looking and was very pale as well. He looked like an emancipated ghost.

"Matt." I called as I shook his shoulder to wake him which I wouldn't have done had I not known he was going to wake with a hell of a catch in his neck.

He jumped and woke up, "Gilbert?! You scared the crap out of me!" he scolded quietly.

"Yea sorry but if I would have left you, you would be really sore when you woke up." I said, "man he looks like he got hit by a bus…"

"Yes, he was almost dead when I found him…" Matt said near silently.

I started to feel a little dizzy so I sat down in the chair beside Mathew. "How long have you been here?"

"Um… since like ten yesterday morning…" he said after thing about it for a bit.

"What? It took you that long to call me?" I said playfully.

"Yes. Yes it did. And it would have taken longer if I had carried out one of my many plans to murder England." He replied.

"Kesesese, yea would have been pretty bad if you had to call me to bail you out of federal prison. I don't have any money!" I said. We both laughed a little and I was satisfied that I had lifted the mood a little at the very least.

"So, have you gotten anything to eat?" I asked curiously thinking that I already knew the answer.

"Nope, I didn't want to leave in case he woke up while I was gone. I want to be here to tell him off the very minute he wakes up." The little Canadian said obviously annoyed with his brother's stupidity.

"Oh ok. You must be pretty hungry though how about I go get something from the cafeteria for you?" I offered.

"Please do. I don't even care what as long as it is edible." He said sounding like a child on Christmas.

"Ok no English food. Got it." I said jokingly and he giggled a little.

"I will be right back," I said standing up from my chair. Unfortunately my dizzy spell decided upon this moment to increase ten fold. My world spun around at sickening speeds and I heard Matt call out to me as my vision went black and I toppled to the ground…

OoO

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**A/N: MWAHAHAHAHA! Two cliffies IN A ROW! XD the only way to stop the cliff hangers is to review... XDDDD **

**At least I try to update every day. The thing about it is I will almost never be able to update on weekends due to lack of a computer at my dads trailer (yea makes a lot of sense dad pay for internet refuse to buy a computer. Good job! Not.) so yea. I know it is only Thursday but I wanted to get this said in case I don't have the time to update tomorrow. (which I should just a precaution.)**

**If I get lots of reviews I will be nice and not make the next chapter another cliffie! REVIEW PLEASE! XDDDD**

**dragon, out!**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: OH MY GOSH GUYS I AM SO SORRY ABOUT THIS LATE UPDATE! I have had a hellacious thanksgiving week! And then yesterday I had so much work! But dragon rider is back baby! And ready for business! Also I would like to answer KaseysteelUSA and dragoneellover.**

**KaseysteelUSA: yea I know that is the beauty of my diseased mind XD .DICTABLE! (that came off despicable me :p) **  
**Dragoneellover: MWAHAHAHAHA! XP *grabs your kindle and runs with it* YOINK!**

**Also peoples, why do I only have two reviewers?! Don't you guys like me?! ToT **  
**I wanna hear from you guys so tell me what you think ok? I will do my best to answer you guys via authors note or private message! **

**Allright, me thinks that's about it so lets get down to BUSINESS!**

**R&R!**

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Canada

"Gilbert?!" I screamed as I launched forward to catch him. He landed in my arms with a soft thud.

"Gilbert? Wake up?!" I gave him a slight shake. He didn't even so much as twitch. What happened he was fine! Absolutely fine! He just randomly fainted! I called for help and watched them take my best friend away. I was now in even more shock and even more lonely than before. I hoped Alfred would wake up soon because if not I am fearing for my sanity…

Canada

"Sir?" asked a cute little nurse.

I blinked trying to collect my thoughts, "Yes?" I answered.

"Your friend Gilbert has quite a high fever but we weren't able to figure out what it was from. Also I just checked your brothers vitals they have mostly returned to normal and he should be waking up any time now." she reported to me.

I pondered Gilberts condition for a minute. "Will Gilbert be ok?" I asked quietly.

"Well… we have to find what is causing the fever so we can lower it but… its not high enough to be fatal yet…" she said slowly.

I hummed in thought for a moment, "Ok… and Alfred?"

"He'll be fine. He needed a few blood transfusions but he is alright now. You should know that the wounds on his arms were self inflicted though…" she said to me.

"I know" I replied bitterly.

About an hour after she left Alfred started to wake up. He blinked and opened his eyes squinting at the harsh light of the hospital room. "Alfred?! Your awake?! Thank God!" I screamed with relief.

He squinted at me for a second. "Mattie?" he whispered.

"Yes its me. I'm here." I replied softly hugging my brother carefully, "are you ok?"  
"Yea I am ok I guess…" he said weakly.

"Good… BECAUSE I AM GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW WORRIED I WAS YOU SCARED ME HALF TO DEATH I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO DIE! YOU HAVE DONE A LOT OF STUPID SHIT ALFRED BUT THIS?! THIS TAKES THE FUCKING CAKE!" I screamed at the very top of my lungs.

He flinched away from me and started to cry a little.

"Why Alfred?! Why did you do this? I don't understand!" I was starting to cry a little myself.

"Why not?" he said brokenly, "he doesn't love me anymore…"

"Alfred, what about me? I love you you're my brother for Christs sake!" I said feeling more than a little hurt.

"Its not just him either everyone calls me stupid and annoying and fat… A-and you left and were gone for a long time… I thought th-that you hated me too like the rest of the world… W-whats the point of living when no one wants you to be there?" he said and broke into pitiful sobs.

"Alfred… how could I ever hate you? You are goofy sure but I find that to be one of your best qualities you can make anyone smile. If some one doesn't like that about you than to hell with them! You are your own person Alfred you choose how you want to be and don't let other people do that for you! You know why?" I said sternly.

"N-no… why?" he whimpered.

"Because in the end all that matters is how you see yourself not how others see you! Besides there are plenty of people who adore you." I said.

He just looked down at his arms that were in his lap. "I wish I could believe you Matt… I really do b-but…. I cant…" he whispered…

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**A/N: OMG guys I am so sorry I know its really short this time but I have no time at all right now! I am sooooooooooo sorry it is not an excuse I know but I m happy I got to update at all! I promise next time it will be soooo much longer! I will try to do a double update to make up for it too! **

**R&R PLEASE! **

**I love you guys!**

**Dragon, out!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: *gasps in shock* double update?! Today of all days?! I am as shocked as you trust me! XD I would like to thank Amy kitty katz for your wonderful review! I would also like respond to you and dragoneellover! So bear with me guys!**

**amy kitty katz: first I would like to thank you for reading my story and I am glad that you like it! I would also like to thank you for your suggestions and I promise that I will try! The speed thing is a problem I have constantly and I think that it and the detail thing go hand and hand. I am not really sure how to fix that besides adding more to the story. As for the paragraph thing I really do try but you see I am used to being nagged at school for my paragraphs being to short so I try to make them longer. For this I know they need to broken up a little more where the speech parts are but I don't have any one to check over it after I write it and sometimes that kind of thing slips right past me. I sincerely apologize for the mistakes and I will try to be better kay?**

**Dragoneellover: ahhh bina you know I love to get on your nerves! XD**

**Ok so I may have rambled a bit to much but it'll be ok! Any way guys I love pall my favorites and follows and I love my reviewers as well! **

**So with out further adieu, lets get down to BUSINESS!**

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_Canada _

I absolutely cannot believe him. He simply refuses to listen to me! Not that it is new for people to ignore me but really?! He doesn't believe me when I tell him that he is loved! Why can't he see it?! Sure there are a lot of people who hate my brother, Cuba for example, but there are also people who love him and his outgoing personality! Japan does! Papa may tease Alfred but truthfully he loves Alfred as much as he loves me! I know that Alfred desperately wants England's approval and to a degree I understand why, but he should be able to move on and for some reason I can't fathom he just can't do it.

I am also frustrated with him because he thinks that I hate him too. I could never, and would never in a million years think of ever having any resentment toward Alfred. I get angry with him at times, yes, but realistically we are siblings. We are going to get on each others nerves some times. It is only natural. He knows that, and he knows that I am a nation and he knows that my boss calls me to do work some times. I can't understand why he would think something absurd like that.

What is really ironic is that usually it is Alfred who can't understand how others feel. I usually read emotions fairly well. I guess I am out of practice. I sighed a bit and looked up at Alfred who was simply blankly staring out the window. He hasn't said a word in hours. He is starting to worry me. I guess I will have to get England to America after all. Maybe he didn't mean what he said. Either way this is his fault and so help me God he is going to fix it or I will PERMANENTLY fix him.

Then there was Prussia. I just didn't believe that the stubborn and usually strong ex-nation had collapsed from a simple fever. It would have to be a REALLY high fever for that to happen and I just know there is something they are not telling me. He probably told them not to. He is so stubborn! I could help him if he would just quit being so freaking proud! I guess he and Alfred are just alike in that way...

OoO

_Prussia _

I had known about this for a long time. The dizzy spells, the nearly unbearable pains in my chest, the shortness of breath, the occasional black outs, I was used to them all by now.

What I was worried about is this time it had happened in front of some one else. And not just any one my best friend. I was positive that he was going to ask the very questions that I don't have the answers for. Then what? What would I do? Nothing except possibly lose my best friend. I would still be sick and there would still be nothing the doctors could do about it.

I have done my best to hide it and for almost a year I had done just that. Even west whom I live with hasn't noticed yet. But this one slip the one black out that got me when I was off my guard could be what blows my awesome cover.

The saddest part of all this mess? The awesome me may just end up alone in the end just like I was in the beginning. The painful irony of this world is one of the cruelest things I have come to know.

There was also the possibility that Matt would tell west. I don't want my bruder to know no matter what. I will not allow it. He has bigger things to worry about. I know he will be epically pissed off at me but I also know it is for the best.

The very moment I had been dreading came far far to soon. Matthew stormed in and immediately plopped down into the chair beside me. I took a deep breath, which was a bad idea because it hurt like hell, and gulped.

"Shouldn't you be with America?" I asked roughly.

"No," he replied way to casually, "he won't listen to me and I also want to know why you told the doctors to lie to me and I want the truth too because I have already forced them to show me your chart and I know everything already."

"If you know then why ask?" I demanded sort of mad that he looked at my chart.

"Because number one, I want to hear it from you and number two I want to know why the hell you felt it was necessary to lie to me. And I want to know how long it has been happening and damn it Gilbert I want the damn truth or else I will leave right now and you will never hear from me again!" He said venomously.

I studied him for a moment and then looked off into the distance "I am sick Matt. Really sick. There are less and less people every day that consider themselves Prussian. I am no longer a country or a culture or an ethnic group. I am literally dying out. Everyday I feel it more and more. I barely got out of bed yesterday. The doctors diagnosed it as some sort of fatal human lung disease thing but I know what's happening to me."

We were both silent for a long time. He broke the silence by asking, "Why did you lie to me?" He son undead absolutely livid.

"A few different reasons actually. I didn't want you to worry about me. I don't want any one to worry about me or treat me like some invalid. I also don't want west to know-" I was interrupted before I could explain further.

"WHAT?! HE IS YOUR BROTHER HE HAS A RIGHT TO KNOW IF ALFRED KEPT SOMETHING LIKE THIS AWAY FROM ME I WOULD NEVER FORGIVE HIM!" Canada yelled furiously.

I blinked in shock. "B-but... West... I..." I couldn't form a coherent sentence.

"Look Gilbert I know you have your pride I get it but you _need _to tell Germany. He may be able to help you!" he said sternly.

I looked at him for a moment and got a bad feeling, "You called him..." I said quietly as I looked down at the floor.

"Yes I did. But I didn't tell him anything. Just that you needed to talk and you were in the hospital. It wasn't my place to say more but if you don't tell him when he gets here tomorrow, I will!" He replied matter of factly.

"... You are right... I will tell him..." I whispered under my breath.

Tomorrow was not going to be good...

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**A/N: ok so I updated from my phone this time and auto correct is a real pain sometimes so I apologize for any freaky weird mistakes that make no sense. I will get some one to check it for me so I can edit those out.**

**R&R PLEASE! **

**Dragon, OUT!**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Yes I know I suck. Get over it. I have no words to describe the amount of work I have had over the course of my absence from this story. All I can tell you in terms that make sense and don't need to be censored is that it was A LOT! But I am back now and I can assure you that I will make up for the late update! **

**I would like to answer someone now so bare with me folks!**

**Princess shorty: I would like to begin by thanking you sincerely for your review! I love each one I get you know! XD As for your concerns some of them have valid reasons behind them which I will explain. 1) This is more of a writing quirk that I developed early on. Like literally when I started writing stories and fanfictions I did that. I like it both because I think it is better for effect and it is just something that most others don't do and it makes me unique as a writer. 2) Actually with this I would like to address everyone with the same concern. I KNOW CANADA IS EXTREMELY OOC BUT THERE IS A REASON! Firstly, I hate the way Canada as both a country and a person is portrayed in the anime/manga! While I do agree that most Canadians are polite and reserved as a whole I do not think Canada should be ignored! He is too freakin adorable! T^T It makes me want to jump through the screen and give him a big hug! Secondly, everyone, even sweet hearts like little Canada has a braking point.(or a line you don't cross or whatever floats your boat) It just so happens that this was Canada's. And finally, it is actually essential to the story! I can't tell how yet but trust me when I say it is! 3) Now that you say something about that I do see how it would be pretty confusing... When I do that it is normally a time lapse... Would it be better for me to put a little icon there or something? That's what I will try! I hope it's less confusing! X3 over all thanks a million for your help! I am glad you like the story and I hope you keep reading! XD**

**Oki dokie! We r ready for BUSINESS!**

**I know I haven't done this in the past few chapters but: **

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT NEVER HAVE AND NEVER WILL OWN HETALIA! T^T**

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_Prussia_

Matthew had absolutely insisted that America and I be put in the same room so he could watch us both. I was a bit to weak to walk, so they ended up having to switch the empty bed that was already in America's room with mine. I didn't mind I was closer to the window so I didn't have to look Matthew in the eyes. Luckily I still had a few hours before west's plane landed and another hour or so after that for him to get here. I was happy about that because it gave me more time to plan what to say. I knew I couldn't lie lest Mattie tell west himself and they both get pissed off at me. What I could do was play it off as nothing so that they won't worry. That should work.

Aside from that dilemma there was America him self. He was extremely depressed and no one could manage to cheer him up. He just laid there and stares into the distance like a zombie. Matthew was really worried because his brother wouldn't move or sleep or even eat. He just laid there. That was all. Matthew was also livid with England. I don't blame him really I would rip someone's throat out for hurting west like that. Little known fact about Canadians though: they are fucking scary when they get pissed off. Even so mattie was not blind. He knew only England could pick up the pieces at this point. Not the brother or the brother's not-so-healthy best friend but the cause of the heart break. How ironic. I wonder what he is going to do about it...

OoO

Time really flies when you are dreading something. In my case the time flew by to fast. I saw west pull in from my window. I knew I only had minutes to finalize my thoughts.

Matthew must have been texting with him or something because he looked up at us and said, "Germany is here."

I had enough time to say, "Yep," nervously before a deep German accented voice came into the room.

"East! What on earth have you gotten yourself into now?! I was having a normal day and then someone calls me and says my older brother is sick in the hospital?! What the hell happened?!" He said not mad per se but annoyed for sure.

"Uhm... I am just sick is all..." I stammered out after a second.

"Really east? Why are in the damn hospital?" He spat at me.

I just kind of looked down. Matthew was right... He did need to know... "I meant I am _really _sick. I have been having really high fevers, dizzy spells, blackouts, and bad pains... For awhile..." I said slowly fearing my little brothers reaction.

"What? Th-that's... Why? Why didn't you tell me if you were getting this sick?" He said a bit softer.

"Well... You are always busy and stuff and I am in your way a lot already... Also I don't want people worrying and treating me differently... Besides I am the eldest any way it is my job to protect you not the other way around." I listed on my fingers. I heard Matthew snort to the side of me.

"East. That is by far the dumbest thing you have ever said. Ever. I love you! You are my bruder and I want to help you! What is wrong?" He said in an irritated tone.

I gulped. This was the thing I had dreaded most Because he thinks he can help but he can't. No one can. I am going to die. I have excepted it. "It doesn't really matter all that much west. There is nothing you can do..." I said quietly. Not quiet enough though he heard me and was not amused.

"YOU BETTER TELL ME OSTEN!" He yelled so loudly that he even got America to look up from his depression.

I was not amused either. He was pushing me a bit to hard. "I AM DYING OK?! I AM GOING TO FUCKING DIE! THERE IS NOTHING EITHER OF US CAN DO ABOUT IT SO JUST SHUT UP!" I yelled in an equivalent volume. Not only did west step back, but Canada did too.

"N-nein... Nein! You can't die you are a nation!" He said even though he knew he was wrong.

"I am not a nation. I was dissolved. My people are either dying out or converting. There is no more Prussia. I do not exist any more bruder." I said gently. He wouldn't except it. I knew he wouldn't. However, that was the reality.

"N-nein... I won't let you! You c-cant d-die! I... I need you!" He choked out holding back tears with all his might.

I tried to respond and comfort him but a violent coughing fit racked my entire body.

"Osten?!" He called as he bolted to my side and patted my back trying to help me calm my coughing. It took awhile but I finally got the painful fit under control and pulled my hand away from my mouth. I was terrified to find it splattered with blood. Not as terrified as west who about stroked out right on the spot.

It felt like all my energy had vanished and I couldn't even hold my head up so I was forced to lay down.

There was some yelling but I couldn't make out the voices. I looked at west one more time before letting the blissful darkness whisk my pain away...

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**A/N: ok so yea it's really short. Sue me. I am sooooo tired. I will post again tomorrow. Promise. Also dragoneelover269 and I will be doing a fanfiction together on my profile that should also be up tomorrow so keep an eye out for that! **

**Dragon, out!**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Ok. Wow guys. I am reeeeeeeeally sorry. I know that it was promised that I was going to update the day after my last update but I just couldn't. I am totes sorry!**

**beaniek4: Thanks so much! I am glad you like it! ;3**

**Also. It was mentioned that dragoneelover and I will be doing a fic together. That will be up tomorrow along with hopefully a double update but absolutely and undoubtedly a single one. Here is how that'll work by the way. It is a crossover between hetalia and fairy tail. At first I will do the hetalia chapters and she will log on to my account and post the fairy tail chapters. Then after a while we will merge and do each chapter together. It's gonna be epic guys!**

**As some of you may have noticed, we have been seeing more of Prussia's drama than the actual drama of the main story. I will do a lot less of that! But there will still be a lot of Prussia and Germany! ;) Also, in this chapter! THE RETURN OF IGGY!**

**But I can't tell u 'bout all that jazz. Guess you just gotta read the chapie huh? XD**

**Any who, time to get down to BUSINESS! **

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN HETALIA! T^T**

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_Canada_

I was in shock. There had been yelling and then Gilbert had said he was dying and then he coughed a bunch of blood and then nothing. No one had come back to tell us of his condition. Germany was about to raise hell from the depths. I could not really blame him I was almost there with my own brother.

Alfred was just laying there staring at a window. He was hurting really bad, this I knew, but he had completely shut down he wouldn't do anything. That hoser England! I wish I could just rip him limb from limb for this! I was so angry! How dare he be so cruel! He may as well have ripped poor Alfred's heart out. Alfred was curled up crying again...

Oh how I hated it when my brother cried... It doesn't suit him. He should still be his loud obnoxious endearing self. Sadly, I knew that the only one who could fix him was the very asshole that I wanted to castrate.

I was at some point going to have to call England and get him to come clean up this mess he had made with Alfred. Truthfully I just could not sit and watch my brother suffer like this anymore. It was tearing him apart.

I flipped out my phone and put in England's contact. It only rang one before someone answered it... someone speaking French...

"Bonjour?" Said my papa.

"Papa?!" I exclaimed checking my contact to make sure I called the right one. I had it said 'England' on the screen. "Why are you at England's house?" I asked curiously.

Papa made a strange noise "Eh... Well... Uuuuuuuhhhhhhm... Mathieu, I have been meaning to tell you this for a long time... Angleterre and I are together. As a couple." He said slowly fearing my reaction.

I stayed silent for a moment. I couldn't think of any words that could express what I was feeling. All I could think was of how badly this would break what was left of my brothers heart. He had spent a long time trying to get England to return his feelings but that stupid Brit never acknowledged him! Not once since the war had he done anything but put Alfred down! I hated him so much! I was starting to second guess my judgement in calling but I knew that this had to be done if I wanted to help Alfred so I grit my teeth and sucked it up.

"Mathieu? Are you still there?" Papa asked tentatively.

"I want to talk to England." I spat venomously*

He seemed shocked by my tone. "Alright..." He said sounding hurt.

There was some rustling before the Brit's voice came through the line, "hello?"

"YOU JERK!" I yelled. I hadn't meant to but I was super pissed at him.

"What? What on earth are you talking about?" He asked confused.

"How could you? Do you have any idea how much he is hurting because of you?! Do you even care?! And to top it off you are going out with my papa?!" I exclaimed.

"Who the bloody hell are you talking about?! And why shouldn't I date that frog? I do love him even if he's a bloody frog!" That now irritated Brit spat out.

"ALFRED YOU HOSER! HE TRIED TO KILL HIMSELF BECAUSE OF YOU!" I yelled as loud as I could.

That little piece of information silenced him. "He what?" England asked quietly.

"He left a note, cut his wrists open and very nearly bleed to death on his bathroom floor!" I said voice dripping with contempt.

"B-but... I don't understand! Why?!" He said obviously confused.

"Hmm... Well I don't know! Maybe because a certain hoser of a Brit told him that he was hated and RIPPED OUT HIS HEART! YOU THINK THAT MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH IT?!" I screamed sarcastically...

OoO

_England_

"Hmm... Well I don't know! Maybe because a certain hoser of a Brit told him that he was hated and RIPPED OUT HIS HEART! YOU THINK THAT MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH IT?!" Canada spat sarcastically.

Guilt crashed down on me like a ton of bricks. It really was my fault... I had forgotten about that little tantrum I had... It was America though I always yell at him! I have said more hurtful things too! Why on earth would he be so devastated about it this time?

"Canadia, I always yell at Alfred! He is just being difficult!" I said stating my thoughts.

"Difficult? DIFFICULT?! What the hell?! You call cutting himself and almost letting himself bleed out DIFFICULT?! And I know you yell at him all the time but have you ever thought about how that makes HIM FEEL?! AND MY NAME IS CANADA!" He screamed.

He was right. I never did stop and think about belittling America. But he'd always bounced right back in the past! What on earth is so different?!

I thought back to the last time I saw the lad and a lance of pure guilt hit me hard in the chest. The revolution... I told him I hated him since the revolution... How had I forgotten? No wonder he took it so badly I may as well have just slapped him... I was crying before I could stop myself. I could barely believe I had said that... And then forgot about it...

"I-I... Oh no... Please tell me he is ok..." I whimpered into the receiver.

"No he is not ok! He has been laying in bed with a dead stare for DAYS! Why else would I call an ass like you! I had half a mind not to as it is!" Canada growled hatefully.

"Ok... Where are you? I want to come talk to him..." I said softly.

Canada spat and address at me and then I handed the phone back to Francis who briefly spoke with Canada and then hung up with a sad expression.

We were in for a long flight tomorrow...

OoO

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**A/N: so there she is folks! I am again extremely sorry for the lateness everyone I am having trouble with school and this and every other problem that wants to get in my way. I will go for a double tomorrow and there will be the collaboration story up as mentioned above. **

**I love u guys! ;)**

**REVEIW PLEASE! **

**DRAGON, OUT!**


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